My 19 month old always gets "SNACK!!!" (she cannot say it without screaming it, as food is one of her very favorite things). Usually it's crackers, fruit or a combination of the two. Today, after her fruit cup I thought perhaps today was the day to share my love of cookies and milk. I presented her with a sippy cup of cold milk and two tiny, yet glorious, chocolate chip cookies. Oh her eyes lit up after the first bite. It was love. Big love. Her eyes shone as she grinned through her chocolaty smeared face. I know that look all too well. I get that way over certain things, too. Usually food. That's my girl.
Then the unthinkable happened. My sweet, blue eyed, golden curled child became something else. Something non-human. A monster unlike any other. She was horrible for the rest of the day. She was into EVERYTHING. Wrecking what little calm I still had after the 2 month old's nightly escapades. I was getting used to being tag-teamed by the two of them. I was getting used to the older one knowing only how to run from the time she woke until bedtime. I was getting used to her being smart enough to get out of any baby gate she encountered. I was used to the extra energy fruit gave her.
I was not, however, prepared for the cookie high. I had never been so wronged by a baked good. I felt so betrayed. How?! How could something so delightful become so venomous?! I knew sugar rushes. Or so I thought. I had never before factored in the toddler coefficient. That's a monumental game changer, folks. If I were a drinker, I would be schnockered tonight just trying to recover from my nightmare. Alas, I'm not - so instead, you get blogged. Pray for me people. Pray that she will awaken tomorrow as her delightful self. Pray that I will awaken less zombie-esque. Pray that I NEVER forget this moment.
One last thing, my peoples. If anyone offers my beloved children sugared candy, cookies, etc.,...we may no longer be friends. I may even go so far as to collect a gaggle of toddlers, sugar them up hard and lock you in a minivan with them...
I'm not even playing.