Payback

My mom and dad-in law visited this week and it was awesome. I really do love spending time with them and it's so easy to see how they could produce such an amazing fella as my beloved. Being...well, mega poor makes their (or my parent's visits) quite a treat because then we get to actually eat out...like REAL food I didn't cook. As MS (Mad Scientist, chilling in my abdomen) not so gently sucks the energy out of me, I have come to better appreciate not cooking. :D Now, I love to cook. I really, really do. It's one of my favorite things, however, when you've woken up from your afternoon nap after work...you just don't wanna. Most of what we get when we go to eat out are things I don't normally cook anyway. The un-fun part is when everyone looks at you like, "What's the baby want?". I don't know. It doesn't know. MS is pretty clear on what it does NOT want, but the other is a little sketchy. Now, there are times when MS knows EXACTLY what it wants...like YESTERDAY so get on it, woman! Most of the time it's more a process of elimination.

One of my favorite parts of being knocked up is when I eat, every flavor is so new. It's either the best thing EVER or must exit my mouth immediately. I think it might be a bit of a bummer post knockedupedness (it is a word...for me. Let it go, grammar police peoples. I love it and will keep it) when I go back to the usual...eh of flavor. I have thoroughly enjoyed rediscovering food. Relax, people...I am still fitting through standard doorways and after the dr visit yesterday I'm actually down some weight since i last convinced myself to locate and exercise a scale (I refuse to have them in my house...they're evil and make people do/say/eat stupid things).

Okay, Dr. visit. First, they were super nice folks. Second, they DID warn us it would be a LOOOONG visit. The visit was said to take 3-5 hours. What they should have said was it'll probably be longer...pack food. So we arrive a few minutes early for our 815 am appt. The lobby was packed full of what I love to call "fat with baby" people. It is fascinating to see all the different sizes and shapes of those protruding baby bellies. Like God was just having a blast when He worked all of that out. First, He makes us look freakish (sorry people - nothing normal about the shape of us pregnant women. Sure it's beautiful with the new life making and all that junk, but really - it's a touch on the creepy side as my mirror daily reminds me), but then He also made us hormonal so if anyone DARES say something they will be obliterated and no one will speak up to save them. Too funny. I'm thinking if pregnant women were put into battle...the planet would both be lost and repopulated in a short time. lol. There is some crazy, dangerous stuff about the workings of a knocked up mind. Emotional control? Psh...haven't seen that in months. I think it was lost with my filter.

Sorry, back to the Dr appt... So, 5 hours and 37 minutes later we left having been instructed on proper nutrition (which is kind of a no-brainer, I would think), i was properly violated, my medical history and that of my man were documented and we got to hear the MS's heartbeat. They only looked for one. Apparently it took a 2nd try as the MS was uncooperative (am I surprise?! nope).  They said if there were more swimming around in there, we'd find them at the ultrasound in July. Yikes...  

So MS prefers sustenance on a bi -hourly basis. After 5 and a half hours, MS was more than a little mad. By the time we got out of there, we grabbed food and came home for a loooong nap. Then we were thinking dinner. We were thinking brick oven pizza from this gourmet market down the street. MS had revenge in mind... After replacing the phone charger cord with a non-chewed in half version (thanks to the puppy who is becoming immune to Bitter Apple spray...), we were set to go for pizza. All of the sudden I looked at my man and said - MS says no pizza. The thought of it made me ill. Instead...I wanted...(holding back tears)...SALAD. Salad is the food that food eats. It's not food. It might be a side dish, but it ain't food (sorry - had to go southern there for a moment). We went to whole foods for their salad bar (because I RARELY have salad fixings at home). Oh MS was mad and payback was to be HUGE. The little bugger even refused to allow MEAT on the salad. Oh it was personal... I knew it the moment I saw the glorious grilled chicken and realized it wasn't going to happen that it was personal. So my salad had greens, carrots, olives, tomatoes,  cheese (because MS is a slut for the cheese) and dressing. I was mortified. Sure i had a little fruit on the side, but MS had certainly made it's point...loud and clear. MORE snacks, less hunger....BRAT...

Though I'm not sure what I expected. It is MY spawn....